Trust

“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.”

Ernest Hemingway

“Self-trust is the first secret of success”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Hmm – Why am I using these two quotes on trust? I believe if you don’t trust yourself, you will find it quite hard to trust others. Trusting in yourself and your abilities leads to self-confidence and will make you less dependent on the opinion of others.

In preparation for one of my early management trainings I came across this model picturing the “Evolution of Trust”:

The four basic trust models according to Robert Fisher are (as pictured here)

o Suspicious still. Don't ever trust anyone, even after they have done something nice.

o Suspicious until. Don't trust anyone until they prove themself.

o Trust until. Trust people until they screw up.

o Trust still. Trust people even after they make mistakes, sometimes even when they hurt you.

I encourage you to contemplate this and explore within yourself where you would place yourself in this model. Also, do you know people who fall into stage 1 “suspicious still”? What is it like to work with them or for them? How comfortable do you feel around them?

My belief is that people who find themselves at the top of the diagram (“Trust Until” or “Trust Still”) are generally more successful in life than those on the bottom. Trusting others enables you to delegate more easily and frees you up to do things that on the Eisenhower Matrix fall into the “important” category. I also believe that being suspicious requires a lot of energy – energy you can direct elsewhere.

So, how can you move yourself from the bottom – should you find yourself there – to the top? Work on your self-confidence; through doing so, you will enhance the trust that you have in yourself. Observe how this increased trust in yourself will change the way you view others over time.

Wishing you a successful week with confidence … Claudia

Find my “Management Gold – Nuggets” useful? Then let me know and share with others.

If you find this inspiring and you would like to explore further, I am delighted to meet with you for a 30-minute-free-of-charge-info-session.

Values

You may have received the download for discovering your values when you subscribed to nuggets – so some of the following may sound familiar.

“If you don’t stick to your values when they are being tested, they’re not values, they’re hobbies.” Steven Reiss

„I think the world would be a lot better off if more people were to define themselves in terms of their own standards and values and not what other people said or thought about them.“ Hillary Clinton

Values are a booster for your success, or they slow you down completely in reaching your goals. There are good reasons why you should make sure that your goals and values work hand-in-hand.

Your values are what is really important to you in life. In other words, there is always conscious intention behind what you do. Values are very individual and of course they change in the course of life or they may acquire a different importance; "Having fun" probably looks different at the age of 19 than at the age of 48. Perhaps "Health" is at a higher position at the age of 55 than at the age of 20. There are no good or bad values, but there are values which are either more or less helpful in the context of your personal goal achievement.

Let me share a client story to illustrate: A client works 70 to 80 hours a week – sometimes on the weekends. He has a family with two young children. As one of his most important values he defined “Family”. So, an obvious question to ask is how this plays out for him. Has he put “Family” on top of his list because he thinks this is where it should be? Or is “Family” really one of his top values and every day, every week he has the feeling that he devotes too little time and attention to the people who are the most important ones in his life. If the latter is the case, he is very likely to frequently feel irritated and dissatisfied. This irritation and frustration will sooner or later show up in his interactions with his team, his peers and his manager.

Reasons, why goals and values should be aligned

Why do some people achieve their goals and others don‘t? Why do you achieve some goals with ease and others you find extremely difficult to attain? The energy that you need to achieve your goal is mostly activated unconsciously. This happens when your goal is what you really want. Goals that you only set with your conscious mind and that run counter to your values do not have a chance. Rather, you drive with one foot on the accelerator and the other on the brake.

If you act in accordance with your personal values, work will give you pleasure and feel good despite possible ups and downs. When you act against your values, you are working against yourself. Few people who are in this situation are aware of this; it can lead to frustration, exhaustion, burnout or other negative symptoms.

Your inner Compass

If you know your values, you have an inner compass that accompanies you on the way to your goal. For example, you will be able to make better decisions with more ease because you have an instinct for what is right for you.

What to do if the value and goal don't match? One solution may be to adjust or nudge one or more goal.

Wishing you a successful week with confidence … Claudia

Want to find out what your values are? If you have not had a chance to download the “Value Work” when you signed up for the newsletter, send me a note and I will send it to you.

Find my “Management Gold – Nuggets” useful? Then let me know and share with others.

If you find this inspiring and you would like to explore further, I am delighted to meet with you for a 30-minute-free-of-charge-info-session.

Management Gold - Nugget #1

I often get asked what I think is essential for leading in this new agile, digital environment – have you noticed that VUCA does not seem to be a thing anymore?

To remind ourselves: VUCA is the acronym for Volatile, Uncertain, Complex and Ambiguous – and for most corporates this is still the environment they live in. Through the pandemic and the remote work environment which went hand in hand with it for many companies, the agile and digital component was just added on top – add to that the ever-increasing speed of change, and we can begin to understand what it takes to stay healthy and effective and at the same time lead your team.

In my view, the most essential attributes of a leader – no matter which level they are at in an organization - are that they MUST like people and they MUST be able to lead (or manage) themselves.

These two attributes are closely intertwined. Liking others becomes a lot easier when I like myself. Liking myself starts with knowing myself really well, and if I know myself really well, I have an easier way to figure out how to lead myself.

Here are some tips on how you can get started:

• Find out what your values are, what motivates you, and how your daily actions and decisions are informed by these drivers

• Observe yourself in different situations and try to dig deeper (“this makes me happy/angry/anxious … why?”)

• Evaluate different aspects of your life (family & friends, health, money, career, fun and leisure, etc.) – the well-known tool “Wheel of Life” can offer a starting point

• Identify who and what gives your energy and puts you on a high, and who or what drains your energy

• …

Why is this important? Exploring all these aspects will lead to increased trust in yourself and self-confidence. You will be able to lead yourself with more authenticity and instill confidence in others.

Wishing you a successful week with confidence … Claudia

Find my “Management Gold – Nuggets” useful? Then let me know and share with others.

If you find this inspiring and you would like to explore further, I am delighted to meet with you for a 30-minute-free-of-charge-info-session.